We are not always as we would think we should be. I was about to say .. like to be, but when I think of how I am at times towards others .. and how I don't seem to care at the time.. then I guess I am being at the time how I want to be.
Later like now .. when i review my actions .. i think .. ok.. do something like this .. define how you want to behave .. I think I have done that before .. but ultimately .. every circumstance is different .. and the behavior that I am trying to curtail .. comes out.
I feel a sadness sometimes.. anyway .. getting back .. I know there is certain situations that bring out the worst in me .. that I let bring out the worst in me .. because it is a choice ...life is always about choices.. sad .. sad about a lot of stuff ... sad that I can not stop the pain in the world ..and sad at the pain I have caused.
Now if anyone actually ever reads this blog .. no I am not talking anything crazy .. i am talking about everyday relationships with the people we love .. and care for .. and how we do not always act in the most caring way. I am also talking about people we work with ..I know there are a lot dicks in the world .. sometimes I am a dick.
You probably are too. Aren't you...? We all are ... at times... self centered .. all concerned and involved in our selves.. You know this life is just temporary .. why we are here .. I do not really know .. I mean there are theories that make sense .. but I really do not know the reasoning .. I will say .. life in this realm is .. because it is worth living ..
I know from an intellectual point of view that being nicer to someone .. is good .. now I know that some circumstances do not warrant niceness .. I would just say .. that keeping hate out of my heart .. trying to make other peoples lives better .. more happy .. like giving a treat to someone who can't get one for themselves..
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